


Rebecca

by HappilyInhuman



Category: The Circle (Netflix)
Genre: Background Samanda, Breakup, Chris is Supportive, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Joey Takes out the Trash, M/M, Seabham, Seaburn and Sammie Chat, Seaburn is Emotional, Shubham gets Advice, Shubham has Feelings, Virgin Shubham, unrequited feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-19
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:55:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22793614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappilyInhuman/pseuds/HappilyInhuman
Summary: Shubham has officially lost his mind. He's taking an unplanned redeye flight, three thousand miles across the country - for someone who may or may not even be single now. #Seabham
Relationships: Sammie(The Circle)/Miranda(The Circle), Seaburn(The Circle)/Shubham(The Circle)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 18





	Rebecca

**Author's Note:**

> The Circle is officially one of my new favourite things. I don't really hate the true Rebecca/Samantha as much as this fic makes it seem - this treatment of her was only necessary for the story!

Shubham looked across the crowded center of LAX airport, moving silently toward his gate. It was dark skied outside the tall curved windows on the side of the building, little stars dotting across it. Toward the bottom of the windows Shubham could see orange light flooding from the outdoor lights.

He was holding a carry on and was almost to his gate.

He couldn't believe he had booked a last-second red eye flight to Boston, all because Seaburn and Samantha had a fight.

He couldn't help but feel sick when he thought about Samantha. She said Seaburn had played her to a T, but Shubham couldn't see it. The face may have been Samantha's, but so much of Seaburn's raw soul was exposed to Shubham. He didn't see that soul in Samantha at all.

He was so confused when he realised he still felt things for Seaburn. It was true that he'd never thought too hard into his sexuality, but he had always just assumed that because he was attracted to girls he was straight. He knew bisexual men existed...but again, he really hadn't thought too hard into it!

He'd never had another man's personality make him feel so intoxicated, it was almost embarrassing. He was honestly scared.

Before he knew it he was sat on his flight looking over the twinkling lights of the city as the plane ascended. It was a beautiful sight that reminded him of his plane ride to London to compete on the Circle. He smiled to himself, he was so grateful to have met Seaburn and Joey...everyone else too. They had truly become family to be honest.

So...why was Shubham taking a red eye flight three thousand miles across America?

~  
  
  


Shubham's apartment was always pretty clean, but as he poured himself into his work earlier that evening his dining room table was strewn with papers. Shubham was planning to rerun for governor of California in 2022. His instagram fans were rallying him, his Circle family was rallying him - he was pumped.

He was in the middle of writing up some of his speech ideas when his phone rang. He laughed, "Of course just when I thought of something good!" His smile was shining.

He was really happy when he saw it was Seaburn, running over to his phone almost like a kid. He was always good at hiding his romantic feelings for 'Rebecca,' but he couldn't hide the excitement. "Hey man!" He greeted, total puppy energy. It was hard, he thought, not to love the person calling him.

Immediately Shubham's ears perked to the sounds of Seaburn howling on the other line. He sounded so pained that Shubham's heart dropped into his stomach.

"Seaburn? Man, are you okay?" The man continued to wail at him, inconsolable. "What's going on?"

Seaburn suddenly stopped wailing only long enough to tell Shubham what had happened. "It's Samantha, she left me. She walked out just a few moments ago." Seaburn had turned on his video and Shubham could see the tears streaming down his face, chin, and neck. "We never fight. We've never broken up. I know she was quiet, but she always said she was happy….now she says she never was."

"I don't know where I went wrong Shooby…" Seaburn took a deep sigh, breathe shaky, "She insists that I lied to her, and not just about one thing...but about a _lot_ of things."

Shubham had listened until Seaburn was done, letting him get everything out before responding. "A lot of couples break up and get back together, even if it's never happened before." He wanted to give Seaburn hope, even though deep down he truly wanted to scream at Seaburn to forget all about Samantha and come to California.

"I don't think she's coming back, Shooby…" The heartbroken man replied, "Other than for her things…"

"Well.." Shubham thought for a second, knowing he needed to support his 'brother'. "You've been an amazing friend and you've comforted me when I needed it… I can come to Boston for a few days so you aren't alone if you want."

Seaburn had a look come over his face that Shubham couldn't quite read. "I might _want_ to-" he trailed off, stopping himself. He decided he didn't need time to be alone. He needed to be with Shubham even if Shubham didn't share his feelings. He needed Shubham in his life. So he'd see him...and he'd try to control himself.

"Yeah man," Seaburn forced a tearful smile, "I'd like that."

Shubham smiled, "I'm going to go look for a flight, see if I can be with you by the morning."

"By the morning?" Seaburn was wiping his tears now, "Shubham you are too amazing." He grinned and then chuckled.

Shubham looked into the face he'd been so shocked by but had grown to love so much. The video quality wasn't amazing in the dark lighting of whatever room Seaburn was in - but you could make out his features. Shubham had grown to love those eyes.

  
  
  
~

Shubham had never known much about Boston, and he'd only been there once before - a month and a half ago when he came to visit Seaburn and Samantha. Now, as he stepped out of his uber, he was immediately met by just Seaburn.

Although looking incredibly disheveled, Seaburn's eyes still shined when he looked down at Shubham and he pulled the smaller man into a tight hug.

"Hey!" Shubham cheerfully greeted, smiling up into the soft eyes.

Seaburn insisted on pulling Shubham's luggage out of the trunk for him. Shubham laughed, not knowing exactly what to make of it. He liked the thought of Seaburn being almost...chivalrous toward him - even if it wasn't the type of relationship he'd envisioned.

Seaburn's eyes swept over Shubham.

The sight was perfect in the slightly cloudy sunrise. His skin was shining, and his dark eyes were smiling just as much as his mouth. Shubham was slightly shorter than Seaburn, and his loose tee was very good looking on him.

"You know, I prefer you like this-"

"How?" Shubham asked, cocking a brow.

Seaburn laughed, "Not dressed in something formal." He couldn't help but look into his eyes, and Shubham looked back for a second before he gulped and looked down in nervousness. The sight gripped Seaburn's heart, Shubham was too cute.

Seaburn thought back to exactly why Samantha had left, and how Shubham fit into it.

  
  
  
~  
  


Samantha was the kind of girl who stayed quiet, so by the time she decided to tell Seaburn they were through - she had a list of complaints.

Seaburn had been sitting on the couch rewatching the Circle one night while she was at the gym with her best friend. He kept rewatching one scene in particular where he and Shubham have a deep conversation. He cringed at some parts - where Seaburn had blatantly misled Shubham - but also felt guilty during some parts about how legitimate the feelings he'd expressed to Shubham really were.

He paused the scene in the middle after watching it for about the fifteenth time. He picked up his smartphone and began to text Sammie.

_Hey Sammie! I really wanted to chat with you about something Circle related if you have the time soon! :)_

He sat back on his couch then and relaxed, waiting for some type of response.

Twenty minutes and a visit to the kitchen later, Seaburn was answering a video call from Sammie. She looked nice today, hair swept back in a bun and her face shining.

"What's up, hon?" She asked, always there for the circle 'girls'.

Seaburn took a deep breathe, "I know one of the points I wanted to get across was that guys could have deeper emotions...but Sammie I have a serious confession about other reasons I came into the Circle as Rebecca."

Sammie's eyebrows were furrowed as she listened intently. "You can tell me, Seab, no matter how embarrassing."

Seaburn gulped, looking down, "When I admitted to Miranda that I was bicurious...that wasn't just a lie, and it wasn't Samantha's truth either." He shook his head at himself, "One of the true reasons I came into the Circle was to have the experience of flirting with boys."

Sammie gasped, "Oh. Oh my goodness Seab!" She was smiling and covering her mouth, "Why are you so ashamed!"

"Shubham! I really hurt him, Sammie…" He was still beating himself up over how much Shubham had gotten attached to him. He'd felt it happening, couldn't stop himself from encouraging it. It felt so right, so intoxicating…

When they spoke, sometimes it was easy to forget that he was even playing a game. It was just two souls communicating. It was just them.

"Well, I mean, if you came into it to flirt with boys even though you were with Samantha, you must have known someone would get hurt, right?" Sammie would support Seaburn, but she still needed him to admit his mistake.

Seaburn sighed, "Of course you're right, Sammie. I made a mistake. I just hope Shubham forgives me. To be honest, if I wasn't with Samantha-"

"Ex _cuse_ me?" Samantha's voice suddenly sprung from the other end of the room.

Seaburn began to freak, immediately ending his video call with Sammie. "Samantha, that was really not what it sounded like, I promise!" He was trying to defend himself, but the anger on her face continued to visibly rise.

"I've been putting up with this unwanted bullshit for too long, Seaburn! We need to have a real talk." She fired back, arms crossed. She was incredibly attractive in her workout outfit, hair pulled back in a ponytail. "I don't think I can put up with what your life has become. Pretending to be me to flirt with boys, the sudden fame, the strippers…"

"Baby, I swear I only passed those strippers on my way to the corndogs!"

"Don't call me baby anymore! I don't believe you, I've never been happy, and after that little video call you had with Sammie, this is _over_ , Seaburn!" She was steaming as she ran into their bedroom to pack a small bag of clothing.

Before he knew it the door to their apartment was slamming shut. As his phone continued to go off with urgent messages from Sammie, Seaburn began to fall apart.

He'd been with Samantha for two years.

He felt so confused because while in anguish for a person who he felt had become a part of him - another cheered for the thought of freedom, the ability to experiment. His mind went to Shubham.

  
  
~  
  


When Seaburn finally got Shubham up to the guest room of his apartment, he smiled and switched the lights on. "Here it is." He chuckled, "I'm sure you remember it from your first stay." 

Shubham smiled, "Yeah, I'm just glad I'm not sleeping on a couch." He giggled, "Not that I wouldn't have done it."

That made Seaburn's heart flutter. "Your flight must have been really long, do you need some time to rest?" He was really hoping to get to immediately spend time with him, but understood a nighttime flight was energy depleting.

Shubham shook his head, "Oh no! I came here to be here for you!" He laughed.

Seaburn laughed along, beginning to lead him out to the living area. He turned on the television but neither of them ever gave it any attention to begin with.

"I don't want you to feel like you need to hold back just because I know you're a boy now…" Shubham began, "Getting your emotions out is how you avoid therapy in twenty years, right?" Shubham got a chuckle out of the other man. "You can tell me anything."

"You know, I'm just extremely heartbroken. I have so many emotions. It's a bit confusing." He wanted to scream that the truth was something the other man did not truly want, but he stayed quiet.

Shubham tried to understand, "So you're not _all_ sad?"

"I really don't know at this point, Shooby…" Seaburn tried to think of a way to change the conversation - he wished Shubham would just hang with him now, not prod into Seaburn's emotions when they'd give him away. "Would you like some water, juice, soda?"

Shubham accepted some juice, and when Seaburn returned with two glasses, Shubham was looking at him in a way that made him excited. He could have sworn he still saw the eyes of a person who adored him, and he hoped he was right.

He sat himself back down beside Shubham before slowly stretching his arm out over the back of the couch behind him.

Shubham took a swallow which went unnoticed by Seaburn. Their positions made Shubham feel small, and the man tried to remind himself that Seaburn really could just be stretching…

He tried to remember what Chris had told him anyway, just in case it _wasn't_ just stretching…

  
  
  
~  
  


It had been two weeks ago when he had his first real heart to heart with Chris. He felt like although they had never disliked each other on the Circle, he and Chris had still never seemed to connect.

That night he had been scrolling through Seaburn's instagram, eyeing picture after colorful picture. He liked an occasional photo, sighing.

He looked around his dimly lit bedroom, remembering the feeling that had pierced him when he found out Rebecca was really Seaburn. He had always tried to pretend that he didn't feel anything romantic for Rebecca, but he knew now that everyone could tell he did. It was all in the comments, everywhere. The truth was that he'd been on the verge of tears when Seaburn said he was Rebecca.

He could feel the same gaping sadness in his stomach as before, and so he left the instagram app.

Part of him was nervous not because of the social aspect of being with another man...but all the technical differences. He sighed again, thinking to himself that he wished he could talk to Chris about all this. He realised early on in the Circle game which team Chris played for and how experienced he was with it.

He shook his head, flattening his lips... _Would Chris even give me advice? Does he care about me?_

Shubham decided to throw his nerves away in that moment, firing Chris a text.

_Hey Chris, it's your Circle friend, Shooby! Wanted to see if we could chat so I could ask you for advice on something._

Not even a moment later his phone began to chime, and Shubham answered the call, face smiling.

"Wow, you're fast, man!" He was beaming at the screen, where a made-up Chris was beaming right back.

"The least I can do for my Circle Fam, honey!" Chris expressed, crossing his leg dramatically and looking at the screen smiling eyes, "Now t _ell_ me, Shubham! What do you need advice on today, my frie _nd_?"

Shubham chuckled, "I'm almost too nervous to say it."

" _Ho_ ney," Chris began, "You do _not_ need to be nervous with me- I have done so many embarrassing- God, honey, I've left events half naked."

Shubham got red, "Well, I needed to talk about...liking boys…"

" _Ohhhhhhhh_ hhhhh" Chris' eyes narrowed and he grinned like a cheshire cat. "So Shubham is wondering about the rainbow, huh?" He chuckled to himself and took a sip from a mug, "Well, it isn't too different from loving anyone else until it comes to the sex, honey…"

At the mention of sex, Shubham could practically feel his ears turning pink out of the heat of his embarrassment.

"And for you, I imagine that will be _very_ different."

Shubham was shocked but kept his smile all the same, "What do you mean, 'for me'?" 

Chris took a deep breathe and looked up for a moment, trying to think of the right words. "Listen, dear…" His lips smacked, "I find it hard to imagine you being the one to dominate there, meaning-"

Shubham wanted to freak out, but as usual he was good at stopping himself. He still hid his face in his hands though, shaking his head, "You mean I'd be in the opposite position. Oh my god. I didn't think about that."

Chris was nodding, "And it doesn't always feel comfortable the first time so-"

After an uncomfortable twenty minute queer-sex talk with Chris, Shubham actually felt a lot less scared by the idea of still having feelings for Seaburn. Now he was left dishing the situation out to Chris, who was filing his nails, nodding his head and occasionally interjecting with commentary.

"I'm just frustrated that my feelings haven't died, and they haven't transferred to the real Rebecca, Samantha. She just doesn't have the soul that Seaburn did, she isn't the person I fell in love with."

"You know that girl seems like trouble." Chris told Shubham, "After meeting the real her I'm shook. She isn't the sweet thing Seaburn made her out to be. She's a shark and I wonder when Seaburn's blood is gonna get spilt, honey."

Shubham laughed, face troubled, "I watch their profiles and he may care a lot about her, but her feelings are obviously not as strong. She seems like she has alternative reasons for staying with Seaburn, and I'm curious as to what they are and what tactics she might employ to get those assets under her own control."

Chris nodded, eyes smiling. He and Shubham were definitely on the same page when it came to Samantha, and he felt extremely sure that the boy in front of him was in the midst of a major love story.

He knew Shubham was smart, of course, so he wasn't surprised by Shubham's eloquently put statements. Instead he appreciated the conversation. He was talking to a man who ran for governor, even if he looked fourteen, he reminded himself. He giggled to himself, baby-faced Shubham.

"Wow, wow," Chris started, "You know as well as I do, Shubham - regardless of what it is she's staying for - she's a snake."

Shubham nodded, "I'm just glad I have you on the line right now. I don't feel crazy anymore. Thanks, man."

Chris nodded, pulling a glass of wine from off screen, "Of course," he swung it in the air above his head, "I'm here for every member of my Circle fam - forever, honey!" His smile and laugh were infectious.

Shubham was so happy as he hung up his call with Chris. Unknown to him though, as Chris hung up with Shubham he contacted Joey. He had a Cupid-esque plan that he was going to put in action, and he knew that Joey could help. He needed someone to take care of little miss Samantha, and that was a job for a womanizer like him.

  
  
  
~  
  


As Shubham forced himself to pretend to pay attention to the show, he was constantly aware of the arm behind him. He was feeling so warm and nervous, his stomach was a waterpark wavepool that wouldn't turn off.

During one of the show's scene transitions, Seaburn looked down at Shubham with a light smile. "Everything alright?"

"Yeah!" Shubham replies almost too quickly. It makes Seaburn wonder until he sees Shubham glance at the arm he'd laid behind him. He pulls it back like it got burned, worried he'd made Shubham too uncomfortable.

"Oh, gosh, I'm sorry Shubham. I didn't mean to make you-"

Shubham shook his head quickly, "No, no!" He tried to stop the man from retracting, "...I kinda liked it." He swallowed, looking at his hands, "I was nervous but I liked it."

At those words, Seaburn perked back up and the smile reclaimed his face.

"Ohhh, okay…" He replaced his arm, but this time even chanced putting it right around Shubham's shoulders instead of on the couch. As he looks down into Shubham's shining face, he thinks to himself how wild this is. He'd wanted to be doing this for the last half a year since leaving the Circle.

It had been a long six months of thinking about Shubham while he was with Samantha. Finally here was Shubham - thigh to thigh with him.

After a few minutes of both men making conversation about less important things, Shubham finally can't contain his curiosity anymore. He looks into Seaburn's eyes and asks a question that twists the other man's gut, "Is Samantha gone for good?" It was the question that had been silently lingering in the air, just waiting to be voiced.

Seaburn searches Shubham's eyes.

As he looks into the other man's soul he feels a tinge of arousal burn into his lower body. Seaburn chanced gently caressing Shubham's cheek. "If she comes back here, I'm going to tell her she needs to leave." He leaned forward, and both their eyes closed, but his kiss landed on Shubham's cheek.

Shubham let out a dissatisfied puff of air and bit his lip, disappointed.

"You seem let do _wn…_ " Seaburn teased.

Shubham laughed, "I expected you to-"

"Do this?"

Shubham made a noise of surprise as Seaburn finally captured his lips. Seaburn was so excited to feel Shubham returning his kiss that he nearly felt sick. Shubham wrapped himself around Seaburn's shoulders. Seaburn was so invigorated by the thought that this man still wanted to be here with him - he even gathered the nerve up to place a hand on Shubham's opposite hip.

Shubham felt the heat in his cheeks after feeling Seaburn's hand on his hip. It felt so sexual, and definitely made him feel very closed in - but _not_ trapped. Never trapped.

After what felt like a million years, Seaburn finally released Shubham's lips. "Shubham...I love you. I've loved you since our time in the Circle, and if Samantha hadn't been my girlfriend I'd have made a move…" Seaburn took a deep breathe, kissing the smaller man's forehead. Shubham was gasping for air, he felt a bit lightheaded.

"Everything we felt on the show...it was crazy." Seaburn continued, caressing the hip under his hand, "I kept reminding myself that I'd been with Sami for two years, but at the same time - being with her doesn't feel like being with you. She closes herself off so much to me. She makes me feel like I'm too emotional and that isn't true.

"She's numb. She wouldn't even walk beside me at the mall. Did she even love me? I didn't know. What I did know was that look in your eye around me." He smiled and nudged Shubham, who also laughed.

Shubham smiled, "I couldn't help it," he laughed, "You were still the person I fell for.."

"I know what I'm feeling for you is the real deal. This is a need I've never felt for Samantha. I _need_ you. I'm _not_ going to be afraid to show my emotions. I will _not_ be afraid to be with you." He licked his lip and leant into Shubham, "I'm done hiding."

Shubham was smiling brightly, "I think we were both scared. I was already working so hard to try to hide my feelings for Rebecca - I was genuinely heartbroken when I first saw you -"

"I saw the tear in your eye and I am _so_ sorry…"

"No, no!" He laughed, shaking his head, "It's really fine...because now, when all is said and done, it's you I've loved, not the skin…" He felt so nervous, even though he could see the love in Seaburn's eyes.

Seaburn paused, and then he felt his face crumble. He was trying to stop himself from crying now. He needed to calm down. He was pretty sure he was the top. He wiped the corner of his eye before pulling Shubham in.

They kissed and kissed for a few minutes, pausing here and there to breathe and look at one another.

"That doesn't mean I haven't now...found myself attracted...to…" Shubham was so nervous that there was no way he could finish that.

"To this body?" Seaburn asked, between sucking kisses into Shubham's neck.

Shubham nodded desperately, very aroused by the way that Seaburn had him pressed into the couch. The taller man readjusted his body. It was just then that Shubham felt proof that Seaburn was definitely excited too. He'd always been too innocent to notice other guy's erections, but it was a bit hard to not notice one when it was pressing rock hard into his thigh like it could leave a bruise.

He was shocked when Seaburn placed a hand on the bottom of his rib cage, slowly caressing down his stomach and pelvis and down to feel Shubham's arousal.

" _Wow_ Shubham, you _really_ weren't kidding, huh?"

Shubham could only give a nervous smile, looking up at Seaburn like the absolute virgin he clearly was. That look made the larger man pull away abruptly, so abruptly that Shubham was left dazed. "Huh? Seaburn?"

"I...I, uh...oh wow, I think I need to go to my bedroom and take care of this."

Shubham didn't get it.

"Listen," Seaburn explained, "I don't expect you to be ready to jump into a physical relationship, so I'll just go to my room and-"

Shubham stopped him, "No, no, no." He was covering his eyes, and laugh-crying.

"What's up?" Seaburn asked.

"I want," Shubham refused to remove his hands from his face, "Oh god, I want you to do it with me."

Seaburn got so nervous it rivalled Shubham. "You know what I'd be doing? You know about it?"

Shubham was more nervous than anything, but the smile never left his face as he gave a nod.

Seaburn took a deep breath, and before they knew it they were both in the room Seaburn had shared with Samantha. They stumbled over her shoes on their way to the bed, smiling, gasping, and pulling each other's clothes off.

Seaburn was in ecstasy, Shubham was right here - and he was so beautiful. Most people didn't understand how beautiful Shubham truly was, and Seaburn thought to himself that perhaps that's why Shubham was always so iffy about social media.

He smiled to himself though, thinking about how when everyone in the Circle got to know him, they were all taken.

It was a true testament to Shubham's inner beauty.

Once he was staring down at the smaller man's bare body, he couldn't take his eyes off of it. The nervousness in Shubham's body language was endearing, and Seaburn put a hand under his chin. He kissed him really softly and then he whispered to him, "Don't be nervous, Shub- You're so cute…"

Shubham felt heat in his cheeks again, and he surrendered himself to everything Seaburn wanted.

Before he knew it Seaburn had gotten lube and was trying to get him ready. He felt so nervous he was having trouble breathing. Seaburn's fingers were so cold against his entrance as they pressed lightly against him.

He gasped and his teeth chattered. "That's chilly…"

Seaburn looked up to Shubham's furrowed eyebrows and leaned up to give him a kiss, "It's okay, honey…"

He took his time stretching him out before finally retracting his fingers and moving his body up toward Shubham's level. He kissed up his neck, and as he reached Shubham's lips, the smaller man wound his arms around him. He sighed as their lips separated.

He felt so aroused he could barely think, and here they were, bare bodies intertwined and all he could focus on was the thought of taking Shubham- but he needed to make sure this was okay.

"Shubham," he kissed his jaw, "Is this okay? You still want to do this?"

He began to reach his hand back toward his night table just in case the answer was yes, and when Shubham nodded, he rushed to snatch a condom from the drawer.

Once he had pulled the condom on, he positioned himself at Shubham's entrance but then began to put more attention into Shubham's lips. He kissed him for what felt like an eternity before he couldn't help but press forward against the heat.

He continued to kiss him, even as he felt him begin to whine through the kiss. The pain of being penetrated was so strong for Shubham that he could feel tears gathering at the corners of his eyes.

Seaburn finally broke the kiss, moving his lips to pepper his neck with more of them.

"Oh my god-" Shubham couldn't help but release some sort of exclamation. He tried to relax himself, even with every muscle in his lower body screaming.

Seaburn kept it slow during this point, very aware of the way Shubham was reacting. He needed the man in front of him to know that he was going to be cared for, that Seaburn wasn't going to rush his body.

"Are you okay, honey?" Seaburn breathes against his ear, making him shiver.

"Y-yes…" He smiled, in ecstasy now, his body numbing the pain, "You can start going faster…"

Before he knew it he was feeling an all-out assault from Seaburn. He was genuinely surprised by how pleasurable it felt to be with Seaburn like this, he never imagined it would feel good to have someone do this to him. Now, as he looked up into Seaburn's face, watching the man grunt and thrust - he couldn't believe the sensations that were brought out in his body. He was so turned on.

Seaburn looked down at Shubham, and he felt so many things. He felt the intense arousal of this moment together - fixated on the way that Shubham's legs fit around his waist.

He also felt so much gratitude that Shubham was even there. That Shubham could forgive him enough to _be here_. He wanted to cry and scream and kiss him so much more.

When he looked down again at the way that Shubham was situated he couldn't help himself, he was brought right to the edge. He found himself straining to make everything last at least a tiny bit longer. He wanted to stay in his moment for just a minute longer. He sighed. He couldn't hold off much more.

Shubham found himself in the same position, and he couldn't believe he'd made it there this way.

Still, he had resigned himself to it. He had allowed himself to feel his emotions, and he had no regrets. He accepted that this was something he'd never experience with anyone else - and regardless of whether Seaburn had come into his life through a lie, he needed him in it now.

Suddenly he felt Seaburn freeze up above him, felt him buckle down against his shoulders, putting more pressure on him. He was getting that closed in, but not trapped feeling again. 

Seaburn kissed him and reached his hand between their bodies, gripping the smaller man's erection and beginning to help him get off. He could tell that Shubham was really close. He felt a bit of pride in knowing he'd been able to get him that far without touching him.

Shubham was breathing quick now, not used to the idea of someone other than himself doing that to him. He'd never done this before. Not with a girl, not with anyone. Seaburn was more attractive to him than he expected, and combined with the thought that he was being touched-

He felt himself freeze up the way that Seaburn had a few moments ago, and he came against Seaburn's hand. He felt so embarrassed suddenly. It was strange.

When Seaburn finally pulled off of him, his stomach turned in an anxious way, he suddenly felt so bare.

Seaburn looked over Shubham with question in his eyes, "What's wrong, Shubham? You should know I'm not going to judge you, look at this pudge-" He puffed his stomach out like a penguin.

"No, no, I know you won't-" He laughed, "I just feel so strange because that was...it was my first time…"

Seaburn's eyes were wide then, " _Shubham,_ you're turning twenty-four this year and you never had sex before this?" He was just in shock.

Now Shubham was really, really hiding his face in his hands. Sitting on the bed and nervously laughing. Next thing he knew Seaburn was all over him and he was being kissed on his neck.

"Here-" He was being cleaned, he felt pampered and the anxious feeling slowly went away, and then he was left on the bed. Seaburn grabbed him some clothes and brought them to him. "See...not so hard to feel better afterward, right?" 

Shubham took the clothes, feeling very, very satisfied.

  
  
~  
  


When they were finally curled up together on the livingroom couch, Seaburn jokingly decided to put on the Circle. They were dressed in just enough clothing to be appropriate, and Seaburn had made Shubham something to eat since he hadn't eaten since before his flight.

They were laughing about the show and sitting back to watch when suddenly the door to the apartment flew open. There stood none other than Samantha...and... _Joey?_

Seaburn's eyes go wide and a piece of popcorn falls from Shubham's mouth.

"What the fuck, Sami?" Seaburn asks, confused as all hell.

Samantha sucked her teeth at him, " _Oh_! You really think _you_ should be asking that, Seaburn?" She gestured to Seaburn and Shubham's entangled, half-dressed bodies, "I knew it."

"Knew what?"

"Knew that you were really feeling things for Shubham. I knew it. As soon as you admitted to Sammie that you were serious about being bicurious that's _exactly_ where my head went."

"Seaburn made no advances toward me until you left last night." Shubham defended.

"Regardless," Samantha gloated, "I knew it." She was smiling now. "Listen, you two are actually kinda cute together. Also, Joey wants to take me out...and _he_ _won_ , so…"

Seaburn rolled his eyes. "You always like this, Samantha! Who cares if I won or not, I got paid for being there! I'm a social media influencer for _real_ , now! So is Shooby. I got you a blue check, and this is how you repay me… So much honesty."

She scowled, "My face got me a blue check, baby." 

Seaburn pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes, this woman couldn't be serious. Without his charisma, quiet, hardened Sami couldn't have charmed the crowd.

Seaburn was unbelievably funny and soft inside.

Joey finally took a chance to speak up, "Shooby, I'm glad you're happy right now. Seaburn, please don't take this personally, man, I have so much respect for you."

Seaburn gestured wildly, "Joey, I don't blame you, there are no hard feelings there…" He gestures to Sami, "But you gotta know that this bitch is emotionally unavailable."

Samantha scoffed, heading into the bedroom and beginning to pack her things.

"I am so glad her name isn't on the lease." Seaburn remarked, "Screw losing this apartment."

After everything calmed down and Joey helped Sami move her things out of her former residence, Seaburn receives a video call from Sammie.

"Listen Seab- I gotta tell you something important, and I need you to not freak out...or tell _anybody_." Sammie started, looking super embarrassed.

Seaburn furrowed his eyebrows, "You can be honest with me, Sammie, what's up?"

"Randi spent the night last night...and she and I slept together…" Seaburn was already cheering on his end of the video call, Sammie continued to explain, "We've been seeing each other constantly, and one thing just led to another… to be honest, Seab, I think this is serious."

Seaburn was doing his thing again - pretending to punch furniture in his joy. Shubham had heard everything from the background and he was smiling so hard.

"My heart is racing," Sammie laughed, "I'm just so glad you're cheering and not confused."

"Sammie, Sammie, listen-" He gestured off screen for someone Sammie couldn't see to come.

Sammie gasped when suddenly Shubham was on screen and Seaburn's arms were around him. They were both smiling and laughing so hard, their cheeks shining. "Same here!" Said almost in unison.

"Oh! My G _od!_ " Sammie screamed, she couldn't believe this. The Circle was producing two real couples.

  
  
  
~  
  


Somewhere off in the distance, Samantha was getting dropped off at her parent's house by Joey.

He took off, and blocked her numbers.


End file.
